is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
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If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
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I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
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