I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
IN THE MIDDLE OF HOOKING UP, HE IS CALLED AWAY ON AN "EMERGENCY". FUCK THAT, MATT'S CAR IS NOT AS URGENT AS MY THIRST.
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
Randomize
