if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
So vagazzling was a success
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
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