Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
Jesus once told his disciples that its better to hang out with your best friend than give some douche bag a bj.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
My penis needs a shock collar
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Randomize
