when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
