What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.