and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
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