Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
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