Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
you will always have a special place in my vag
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
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