Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
And I swear to god I'll divorce you if you so much as say a single sentence in Yoda talk in our bedroom. I may be a nerd but that's just fucking creepy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
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