where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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