I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
Let's just say that in a last ditch effort to avoid getting arrested I said to the cop "but I'm not even that drunk" and he proceeded to point out (in front of a crowd) that I had "fucking pissed my pants"
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
