like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
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