So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
I'm making a will, in it I'm leaving you my skull.
Randomize
