one might say we're banned from that church
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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