Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Next person that gets my dog drunk is paying to have my carpet cleaned. I am tired of getting up to pee and stepping in dog barf.
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
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