My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
Randomize
