Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
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