I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
Randomize
