can you take me to a tanning bed
sure, why though?
i have to go once so i can blame these herpes on the tanning bed and she won't get suspicious
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
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