I was taking a piss and started puking. I pissed myself and made a mess in the bathroom. Passed out, then got up and went back out from 11pm to 5am.
I changed 4 diapers and slept horribly in our hot apt. Now, I'm at my inlaws house watching the Rangers get pummeled. Oh how our lives differ.
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
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Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
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i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
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