I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
well you can't waste a boner
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
You are the only one who would stop a bum, tell him to open up, then pour straight vodka in his mouth. You made his year.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
you never un-have a 4some
Randomize