I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
Another f*ing night of vodka youporn and xanax. I need to get a goddamn life
3 great things that go great together... But not on a Friday night. Perfect on say... a Tuesday.
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
Randomize
