did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
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