My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
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