As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
he said he wished i had balls so he could kick me in them. then we had sex obviously
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
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