eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
So much Jack, so little girl.
So I "accidentally" brought my road beers into church for this wedding
And they fell out of my pocket on the pew. Made quite a noise...safe to say I'm batting a thousand
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
Holy shit he’s stupid hot! If you don’t hurry up and make a move my ovaries are going to march over there and introduce themselves
Randomize
