I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
I AM GETTING LAID TONIGHT YES HAPPY DAY PRAISE JESUS ALMIGHTY IN HEAVEN DEAR GOD CHRIST YES DADDY YAAASSS
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
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