Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
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