I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
i may or may not be watching the land before time
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize