i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
death, taxes, and me drunk texting you are 3 certainties in life
Randomize
