He asked me if I "almost moaned"
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
Randomize