In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
Randomize
