i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
you told grandpa to call you daddy
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
