Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
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