I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
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