I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
what the fuck happened to the tacos
Pray for me.. I'm like the lonely vagina in a sea of sworming dicks
Randomize
