quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
Randomize
