So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
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his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
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I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
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