would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
Are we still banned from the library?
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
Why did I wake up in bed with the ironing board and a Mariah Carey mask? Vodka hates me
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
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