How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
You got me 4 pizzas and i just saw this. I'm too drunk for this shit. I just yelled "4 pizzas holy shit!" At the pizza dude
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Randomize
