just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
Randomize
