Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
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