Barsexuality is the new black.
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
Randomize
