What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
He must have sensed I was about to trade him in...he's really stepped up his sex game
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
Like, when both of your dads are drag queens you're bound to have some amazing Halloween makeup
Randomize
