I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
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