Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
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still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
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My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
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