my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
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