I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
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