Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
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