One girl and one boy is just not enough.
Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
Who did Billy Mays play for?
Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
Randomize