i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
I work nights. I sleep in. I take online classes. And fuck bad bitches. I'd say those are some perks to grad school.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
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