Question: If I woke up with one eyebrow mysteriously missing, do I shave the other one to match?
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
well, you know. whores of a feather.
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