Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
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