i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
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