I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
