i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
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he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
We were talking about threesomes when she went to say who she would have as her third. She did not get to finish her sentence because her bf already said my name.My sheer presence destroys relationships.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
Randomize